“You mistake my choice not to feel as a reflection of my not caring, while I assure you the truth is precisely the opposite.”
Internet ‘dating’
Went on a date tonight with some yokel.
Correction, asshole. As that is an insult to yokels. And possibly assholes as well.
Within the first 15 minutes, he had talked at great length about his dog, who had bitten him, and so in reaction, punched the dog in the head.
He also said that since the dog was pissing everywhere, he was going to tie rubber bands around the dogs balls.
WHAT IN THE FUCK?!?!!!
He then suggested a movie, to which I agreed. He let me pick, so Star Trek was the obvious choice.
Who is this guy he kept asking. It’s motherfucking Khan, you idiot!
He then felt it was appropriate to lean in at one point and bite my neck. Not a nibble. A bite bite!
Afterwards, he was pissed I asked to go home, since I live on the other side of the valley. Since my truck was in the movie parking lot, there wasn’t much he could say.
Christ almighty. So glad that is over with.
#plentyoffish #date #fail #animalabuse




